Find the Monster
By John David Ira
|Feb. 12, 2006
I dunno what to write since I’ve never had a diary. I found you just sitting out on the sidewalk in front of our house. Maybe someone dropped you? You’re empty so . . . FINDERS KEEPERS!
My name is Sally. I am 10 years old FINALLY! My birthday is August 29. I have blonde hair and green eyes. I like Tiger Tina, horses, and my mom. She is the best mom in the whole world. She is like Tiger Tina because she doesn’t let the bad animals near me or my play horses.
Ok, gotta go—time for dinner and mom says I won’t be big enough for 6th grade if I don’t eat.
Ew. Spaghetti. Blek.
Feb. 25, 2006
Katie is such a big butt. She was so mean and kept taking my purple pen from my pen box and every time the teacher would turn around, she only caught me yelling at her to give it back so I ended up in trouble. Mom wasn’t happy when she picked me up. I tried to tell her it was Katie’s fault but she wouldn’t listen so I ran to my room to listen to the radio.
I hope I can win those tickets to Tiger Tina Live! I love watching Tiger Tina so so so so much so maybe if I win the tickets, mom will take me to see the live show!! My favorite one was when she made everyone be nice to Alexis Alligator. All the other animals were being mean to her because she was scary but she really just had something stuck in her teeth that was hurting. Tiger Tina is so nice to the other animals.
Mom probably won’t take me since she is mad at me.
Gotta go now! Nice talking to you, Diary.
Feb. 28, 2006
Blah Blah Blah . . . What do I write? Mom says I should keep writing about my day in this diary even though I don’t have anything to say.
Let’s see . . .
Katie finally gave me my pen back today. She is my best friend, but sometimes she can be a bully. Ms. Grandin said that we need to get along or she will separate us.
OH! You remember where I found you, diary? Out there in front of the house? It was so weird . . . I didn’t win the Tiger Tina tickets yesterday because some stupid old guy won them. Seriously, this guy was so dumb! He kept asking if he won and the radio guy kept saying he did. He couldn’t pay attention because he was so excited and kindof creepy. Then he started CRYING! Not kidding! So I just turned it off and went outside this morning to go over to Katie’s house because I left my bike over there last week and then I found two tickets for Tiger Tina OUTSIDE WHERE YOU WERE!! WOW!! Mom even said we could keep them since we can’t figure out who they go to.
Im so lucky, I should go skydiving! JK I would never do that . . .
PS. Thanks, God, for the tickets!!!!
Mar. 4, 2006
I’m not here to write a lot. All I want to say is IT’S TIGER TINA DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mar. 5, 2006
I AM SO MAD!!!! My mom took me to the show and we didn’t even get to see it!! Some stupid guy was getting arrested by the police men outside for fighting with the people at the snack stand and mom didn’t think it was safe. When we walked out, the man looked very angry and confused until he saw me and then started yelling bad words at mom. I don’t remember what else he said, but he was so mad at everyone and wouldn’t stop throwing his hands around in the air. If he said bad words to me, I would have to give him a piece of my mind! She said she didn’t know why he yelled at her, but I don’t think she is telling the truth. Adults are liars sometimes. I would never lie to mom, but she probably doesn’t want to scare me because of how mean that man was.
Oh well . . . I’ll just have to see it next time it comes to town. At least my mom took me so I can’t be very mad at her.
I love my mom.
Maybe I shouldn’t be writing this. Jamie says it’s evidence if I get caught. Jamie says it’s not OK. Jamie doesn’t like me seeing her, but I promised Jamie that I would be careful. She says that if they see me, someone might call for the police. Adults have to follow the rules, but sometimes I don’t want to be an adult anymore so I don’t have to. I can’t help how I feel.
So I met someone the other day. I’ve been waiting for the day that I find her—the right one. Well, I didn’t actually meet her, but I saw her. She is so beautiful. Her hair is blonde. It’s very long and blonde and beautiful. I went to her house and left her a gift. It was a purple plaid journal. She seemed to like it a lot. I liked it a lot because it reminds me of her from when I saw her at the library with her mom.
When I see her, I think she might be scared by me so I don’t talk to her or let her see me. If I get too excited to see someone, sometimes my head gets too hot and I don’t know how to control myself.
It is better that she doesn’t see me be upset. That wouldn’t be nice or fun.
I saw her wearing a Red Tiger Tina backpack and Tiger Tina is doing a live show in town so maybe I can find tickets for us to go. She would love that. I could spend time with her and hold her hand.
Thanks, God, for listening. I feel better now. Maybe I will write to you again after I have some time to think.
I heard on the radio the other day that they have free tickets to Tiger Tina, but I have to be caller ten. That’s right after nine and before eleven and will be really hard to get. Ten is a nice number though, since it has a one and a zero. I hope I can get them for her. She will be so happy and maybe I can talk to her.
The contest starts tomorrow. For now, I will just lay here next to her picture that I took and look at her long and pretty blonde hair.
I WON! I WON! I got the tickets! I can’t believe I won the tickets. Caller ten is so hard to win. Thank you for listening. I know it’s hard to sometimes because my brain isn’t right and I sometimes make bad decisions, but thank you. I know she will love them because she loves Tiger Tina since she has a Tiger Tina backpack. I am going to take them and leave them where I put her journal tonight so maybe she will find them tomorrow. I wish I could see her. I wish I could hug her and make her happy, but she doesn’t love me back so she wouldn’t like that.
It’s ok though. They gave me three tickets and I am going to keep one. Maybe she won’t be afraid of a big man with muscles when she sees me at the Tiger Tina show. Maybe she won’t even see me. I’m too shy to talk to her because I don’t want her mom to tell her not to talk to strangers. Strangers aren’t always bad and I don’t want to hurt her. I want to be there with her, but her mom won’t understand. Nobody else would either. Maybe I can talk to her when her mom is gone or in the bathroom or getting snacks for them to watch the show. That would be so great.
I think I made a mistake.
Actually, I think the cashiers at the snack stand made a mistake, but I did some bad things too.
I went to the show and wanted to see her and her pretty long blonde hair, but the cashier didn’t hand me my change coins first, then bills so I asked him to do it again and he called me stupid.
I can’t help it when people call me stupid—I’m not stupid, I’m just not like everyone else. So I hit him in the face. It wasn’t hard, but it made his bottom lip bleed. Then they called the police officers to come get me and now I’m writing to you from jail. They said I can talk to a lawyer soon, but I don’t want to. If I don’t get to see her, there is no reason to try to get out of this place. It’s ok in here, but it’s not very clean.
Her mom looked at me like I was a ghost. If I had said nicer words to her mom as they were walking out, maybe she would’ve talked to me and let me meet Sally. Oh yeah, her name is Sally. I could hear that as they left the theater. Sally is such a beautiful name.
I don’t know what else to say now. I started writing to you hoping you could help me see Sally without getting in trouble. I love her and want to be with her, but her mom won’t let me. How do I live without Sally, God?
Maybe I’m just supposed to be sad and lonely. Maybe Sally’s mom was right so many years ago. Maybe Sally could never learn to love me, her autistic dad.